


Akko's Favourite Meal

by TracedInAir



Category: Little Witch Academia
Genre: Akko loves food perhaps a little too much, Amanda dropping a ton of innuendos again like they always do, Comedy, Everyone roasts Bri'ish food, F/F, Humour, it's disgusting, like they should, this fic is just one long dirty joke I'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-17 02:21:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28841562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TracedInAir/pseuds/TracedInAir
Summary: Everyone knows that Akko loves food. A lot. Akko herself would be the first to tell you, if she wasn't too busy making very happy noises every time she eats something particularly delicious.Almost too happy, one might say...
Relationships: Diana Cavendish/Atsuko "Akko" Kagari
Comments: 24
Kudos: 181





	Akko's Favourite Meal

The doors to the manor swung open. Diana started to say some welcoming spiel or other, but Amanda just swaggered past her. “Save the fancy talk for the fancy folks, Dish, I wanna get indoors  _ before _ nightfall. And  _ not _ that kind.” They shot a mock wink at Barbara and Lotte, who rolled their eyes back at them.

_ “Must _ you be so irreverent as to interrupt my greetings in my own house?” Diana placed her hands on her hips.

“Only half yours now, right?” Amanda smirked, trailing the rest of the usual crew behind themselves as the doors swung shut. “Speaking of, where’s your blushing bride?”

Diana sighed. “Akko elected to make dinner herself for the occasion. Something about ‘saving our poor friends from the tyranny of British cuisine,’ I believe.”

Sucy snickered. “She’s not wrong. Imagine colonising the entire world for spices, then not using any of them except black pepper.”

“Our staff are well-versed in cooking a range of foreign cuisines.” Diana sniffed.

“Yeah, for people who think  _ mayonnaise  _ is spicy.” Amanda grinned. “Or are you gonna tell me that Aunt of yours actually eats anything above like, a zero point one on the Scoville scale?”

“I’m impressed that you know the term,” Diana commented, leading the group towards the dining room. “But no. Aunt Daryl once spat out some  _ sweet chili chicken _ because it was  _ burning her tongue,” _ Diana said with an exaggerated mockery of her Aunt’s voice.

Heh, nice to see good ol’ Dish picking up Akko’s silly accents habit. Marriage truly was about people sharing the best of one another, huh? Speaking of… 

“How was your honeymoon?” Barbara asked quickly. “I know you already told me, but I  _ have _ to hear about the flower garden again, that sounds like a  _ dream.” _

“It was…” Diana began with a warm smile on her face as she retold the story to a suitably sappy and appreciative Barbara. And Hannah. And Lotte. And hell, Amanda themselves could respect a nice happily ever after, especially when it involved as great a friend as Akko.

And Dish herself—or was it Kag-Dish now?—was alright. Sometimes. Amanda would go to their deathbed without admitting it, but she and Akko deserved one another, and that was about as high as praise got.

The eight of them settled around the dining table, the second seat at the head conspicuously absent for now.

The kitchen door slammed open.

Akko stepped out, wearing an apron over her evening dress with  _ “Kiss The Cook!” _ written on it. And an outline drawing of a suspiciously Dish-like face kissing the cheek of a face with a suspiciously Akko-like ponytail. Disgusting. Adorable, but disgusting.

However, much more important than what Akko was wearing was what she brought  _ with _ her. A dizzying array of wicker boxes and dishes—actual dishes, not Dishes—weaved through the air, suspended by Akko’s wand. “Ladies and Amanda, starters are  _ served!” _

“Oh,  _ hell _ yeah!” Amanda called as nearly a dozen dimsum options spread themselves out on the table.

Jasminka wasted no time, lifting a shumai with her chopsticks and popping it into her mouth. “Excellent!” She lowered her chopsticks to briefly applaud Akko. “Did you make all of these yourself? The effort is truly commendable.”

“Yeah! Thank you!” Akko bowed as she seated herself next to Diana at the head of the table. “Not gonna lie it  _ did _ take me all day to prep everything, so you all better enjoy!”

“We are, thank you!” Lotte said, reaching for a nikuman with her own chopsticks. “Are they all Japanese dishes?”

“Uhhh, mostly,” Akko said. “Couple of them are Chinese, that one’s Korean.” She gestured at a bowl of kimchi. “Didn’t make it myself cause it takes like, several months to ferment, but…” She popped a piece into her mouth, letting out a  _ very _ happy noise as she chewed.  _ “So _ good.”

A very,  _ very _ funny joke immediately jumped to the front of Amanda’s mind. They glanced around the table. Everyone here would find the joke distasteful at the very least. Diana would probably hate it.

Perfect.

“Hey Diana, does Akko normally make that noise when she eats cabbage?”

Diana flinched, before recovering her composure and shooting Amanda a glare. “Must you? Really? Less than a minute into dinner?”

A normal person would have laughed it off, moved on with their life. But Amanda saw things. Noticed things that others didn’t.

And they  _ noticed _ that flinch.

Amanda let it slide for a moment, letting dinner continue, but they were on the lookout now. Just waiting for some more ammunition, which already looked to be arriving. Akko bit into a rib, and let out a sound that would make a sailor blush.

Amanda watched Diana like a hawk. And they saw the way Diana’s face twisted a little, as if she were about to bite her lip and stopped herself.

_ Proof. _

“She  _ does!” _ Amanda declared, bursting out laughing and pointing at Akko victoriously.

“I what now?” Akko asked, pausing with her chopsticks halfway to her mouth.

“How do I put this delicately…” Amanda started, smirking at Diana.

“You could simply choose not to.” Diana wiped her lips with a napkin.

“Yeah, see, that just makes me wanna do it more.” Amanda grinned, enjoying the confused looks from around the table. “Y’see, my dear Akko, it has come to my realisation that the very vocal appreciation you show for your one true love, delicious food, is the exact same tone of voice you use to  _ appreciate _ the second lady in your life.” They winked at Diana.

Akko had returned to eating halfway through Amanda’s point, and let out a delighted, “mmm,” as she did so. There was no missing the way Diana shivered just a little at that. “Wait, are you saying I—”

“Make sex noises when you eat. Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying.” Amanda clarified with a smirk.

Hannah slapped them over the back of the head. The rest of the table groaned at their antics, even Constanze. Diana, however, did not deny it.

Akko just shrugged. “What can I say? Food’s good. I mean, not as good as—”

“Please do  _ not _ finish that sentence.” Diana warned sharply.

“…The warm and gentle love I feel from you every day, my darling wife?” Akko smiled angelically.

Diana narrowed her eyes. “I love you too, Akko.” She turned back to her food, lifting a gyoza with her chopsticks. “Ow!” Diana nearly dropped it onto her plate.

“What, too spicy?” Sucy asked with a devilish grin.

“No, just ah, too hot,” Diana blew on her gyoza, reaching for her glass of water.

“Well you’re too hot and I still eat—”

Diana spat water across the room as the rest of the table descended into a mixture of groans and laughter.

“One dinner.” Diana sighed. “That’s all I ask.  _ One. Dinner.” _

**Author's Note:**

> I made the joke about Akko being a little too vocally appreciative of food and anyway one thing lead to another and I wrote this in like an hour LOL.


End file.
